083: Set Criticism Aside but Use Feedback to Your Advantage

Does it seem that everyone’s a critic?

Criticism does indeed run rampant.

Yet its close “cousin,” feedback, often flies under the radar.

However you frame it - criticism can sting while feedback can (and should) land more softly and beneficially.

The greater sign of maturity isn’t dishing it out it’s more about how you take it.

You can react or you can respond proactively when you're on the receiving end of criticism or feedback.

Comparing the two: criticism carries less value because it's typically negative while feedback carries the potential for something to be gained.

It’s important to distinguish between the two whether you’re on the giving end or the receiving end.

This matters as you age because criticism can easily worm its way into your outlook and worse, your language, earning you the reputation of being "cranky."

If you want your earned wisdom to have value you’ll want to learn how to provide useful and meaningful feedback instead of playing the role of the critic.

Breaking free from a critical spirit and discovering how to use feedback benefits yourself and others

• Keep your cool
• Listen, discern, and learn
• Improve yourself and others

Keep your cool under critical circumstances

It's said that, "a cool head prevails."

Weathering a critical storm or accepting feedback with grace can actually help you develop a more resilient character.

Knee-jerk reactions to criticism or dismissing valuable feedback typically leads to unproductive outcomes.

• Give the critic their due by refusing to engage ("Never wrestle with a pig because the pig likes it and you'll just get dirty.").
• Respond to feedback with an open mind.
• Stay calm, cool, and collected realizing you have control over your response but not over someone else.

Listen, discern, and learn from feedback

Listening is way different than merely hearing.

I'm a strong advocate for listening between the lines of conversations, text messages, social media posts, or any form of communication.

Your ability to discern what's actually being communicated has a significant impact on how you learn from feedback.

• Consider the source - some feedback doesn't carry the weight that another's might
• Extract what's useful from feedback and discard the rest.
• In the end, it's what you do with the feedback that matters.

Use what you learn to improve yourself and others

It's rare that pure, unfiltered criticism will make a world of difference for you.

Irritating, hurtful...yes.

Useful...rarely.

The point of criticism is mostly a self-centered attempt to muddy the waters and avoid a productive solution.

Feedback on the other hand, when well-intentioned, has the innate potential to be helpful.

Proactive feedback creates a domino-effect of sorts in that it helps you improve and further impacts those in your circle of influence.

• Be teachable and coachable so you can teach others.
• Let wisdom take root in the soil of well-received feedback in your life.
• Have the mindset of a life-long learner by never thinking you're beneath the feedback you receive.

Criticism has a short-shelf life while useful feedback (if shared and received openly) can add to your longevity

• Keep your cool
• Listen, discern, and learn
• Improve yourself and others

Press on...

Eddie